I will be on video soon, just getting settled

I’m sorry to say I have to leave 15min early today, so I’ll hop off quietly near the end.

no can't hear it

Resetting my video. Turning it off momentarily

I'll be able to turn my video on in 5 min

FULL APPROVAL of a need for a soaking tub!

Is that the answer to the conflict of wanting the masculine and at the same time, being afraid of the masculine?

I have to sign off unfortunately. Excited to catch the replay :)

I want to be seen but I mask

Defensiveness, resistance, avoidance - rebellion

Abandonment for sure, it doesn't stick around

Infatuation towards me, yet it seems they are over-extending and speeding up the pace and not attuned. I tend to let it happen and then get scared and pull away — I tend to not honor & vocalize my pacing because I don’t really know what that is

I want to be penetrated by a strong masculine and I am afraid of surrendering and being penetrated.

I think of my biggest pattern is not allowing myself to be seen completely too. i desire this depth of love, yet i can sabatoge this myself by not taking step to be vulnerable. I broke this with my last partner, where i felt completely seen and accepted and loved, so now I'm feeling afraid to open again to a new masculine.

yep, same shea!

i'm afraid the next masculine won't be able to hold me

Yes, Shea. Being perfect, shrinking-not showing myself cuz afraid won't be liked, not taking care of myself fully and go too fast

Totally resonate Shea with the trust!

Yes I understand that too Shea

I resonate with what Shea just said.

Afraid, scared of being judged. Shrinking so that I don’t risk upsetting

I struggle voicing my desires/needs without charge and then shut down and become avoiding when he doesn’t give me want I want

I don't feel like it's so much about control anymore, I hold the masculine with more empowerment than that now, but it's more about attracting men with little vision for their own lives

PACING & PERFORMING over my truth & natural rhythm … OMG

The way I have explained it is as if my inner masculine has put my inner feminine in a cage. And recently has finally let her out, but she's so used to being caged, she doesn't know what to do.

I am healing and emerging from this state, but my life pattern until the past few months has been that my inner masculine has dominated my life to the point where my inner feminine did not feel safe to be seen or to emerge into the world.

I resonate with your experience Beth

unwavering masculine devotion

cherished protected

Depth and matching

Respect

depth of intimacy, reciprocity of treating each other with sacredness, reverence

steadfastness

Strength; clarity of purpose

connection, being open to listening to my needs/vulnerabilities, protection

Deep presence and stillness, and attunement to truth, listening and leading without leaving me behind, safety and guardianship of my heart and well being

strength and support so I can relax

Denise, I resonate SOO much!

i can relate too Denise

Denise, same here

not having the presence of a strong anchor of my inner masculine is partly why I feel judge and can sink into feeling like I’ve been victimized

Yes, becky, i can relate to the emptiness

Thank you Beth, feel ya 🙏

That's so beautiful Maureen! I experienced something similar

first time i have felt the masculine and feminine energies at the same time. They have been so polarized before. I normally just feel the feminine when my masculine becomes exhausted